Educate me, don’t belittle me!
“You don’t even know this?”, he asked with a frown and in a disgusting voice!
I have often been asked this question and looked upon as someone who ‘ought’ to know it all. Why? I don’t know everything and neither do you! And, we both know that. Aren’t we all on the path of learning, deepening our understanding, and growing along the way?
Fine, I don’t happen to know ‘this piece of information’ that you are proudly claiming to ‘know’. How about simply ‘sharing’ it and/or ‘suggesting some resources to refer to’ instead of demeaning me with this question in the first place? Also, stop ‘assuming’ that I know. Instead, could you ask me first respectfully and simply, “Hey, do you know this, or have you heard about it?” If I reply saying ‘No’ then tell me what it is and how can I ‘know better’ and educate myself.
Because as they say, “Knowledge is power and sharing knowledge is powerful.”
On the face of it, being ‘belittled’ can infuse the urge and eagerness to know more and in my experience, it does peaks curiosity but our mind also buzzes with a nagging voice, “Damn! You didn’t even know this. What have you studied in School? What have you learned? What are you doing with your life!” Well, the last line might sound like an exaggeration but our mind does create a drama and ultimately cultivates a ‘Fear of not knowing’.
Talking about School, this kind of fear does have roots in those ‘embarrassing’ moments in classrooms when you seldom mustered the courage to ask a question but you were shut down by your teacher with an irked expression and disparaging voice, “Haven’t you been listening?’ or ‘What kind of stupid question is this?’ or ‘What have you learned in your previous classes? You don’t even know this!”
In my school days, not many children asked questions and I was also one of them. However, the catch was that I did had questions springing in my mind, loads of them but I asked them only after the class and directly to the teacher or my classmates. It was only in higher classes that I opened my shell as I genuinely wanted to know no matter if the teacher shuts me down but honestly, I still struggle to ask questions. Now, the idea of asking the ‘right kind of questions’ has become terrifying. What is right, anyway? How do I know what is right? Well, I am still exploring this. However, I have recently learned that not all answers can be known at that point in time and sometimes you have to have the patience and persistence to let them unfold. On the other hand, if you do get an answer from your teacher, friend, or anyone to a question. Don’t stop, remain curious, and explore your own version of the answer from your own experience because I think that is true knowledge. Nonetheless, I think that knowledge is scarce and abundant; in a sense that you must develop a mindset that ‘I think I know it but what I know could have different perspectives and dimensions and I must explore them.” How? — by interaction, meaningful dialogue, and being courageous to speak ‘what you already know’ because how else would you know better and understand deeply and get a different perspective? And, why is this process of communication even important? Maybe, because knowledge has no value of its own, it embodies value when it adds value and enriches the ecosystem of the earth which includes people and the natural environment and this universe. Isn’t this what the purpose of education is?
I feel that a shift starts with embracing ‘not knowing’, accepting it, and exploring answers than saying,” Ya.. ya.. right. I know.” (when in your head you actually don’t know what the other person is saying). I feel real power is being true to yourself and the other person by simply asking, “I couldn't understand what you meant when you said…. could you please tell me more or how can I understand this better because I don’t know.” You might not appear ‘smart’ to the other person but ‘the way’ you say it and your ‘keenness’ to know, seek, and learn makes all the difference.
So, educate me. Ask me more. Tell me more. Let’s talk and discover something we maybe ‘both didn’t know’. Isn’t that a possibility we could venture?
Because we are tiny specks in this entire universe and functioning with a ‘knowing-it-all’ attitude is a self-trap that would probably make you feel isolated, lonely, and just sad, of course in the long-run.
Be a little better and let others also become a little better. Anyway, we are all little, in a broader sense no? :)